So I've got myself into a lovely little morning routine that really is making the whole being awake at a stupid hour thing a lot easier. It mainly involves getting out of bed and eating breakfast, which I know is what most people generally manage to do without making a whole big song and dance about, but let's not lose sight of the fact that up until last week, my alarm going off was my signal to pull the pillow over my head and burrow deeper into my duvet.
This morning I decided to have a little Breakfast Television with my cereal, and duly popped BBC Breakfast on. There on the news was Boris Johnson opposing the new Heathrow runway. Now, say what you like about Boris the Bumbling Buffoon, but the video footage they had was of him on a panel with Roy Puddifoot and Zach Goldsmith... Puddifoot looks like a gay serial killer from the 1980s, and to be honest, the entire Goldsmith family look like they're direct descendants of Seabiscuit the Horse. I know who I'd rather have as my mayor.
So... I switched onto GMTV, where I was greeted with the hideous sight of Mr Motivator in his aerobics gear. For god's sake man, give it up. I don't want to see your manboobs jiggling up and down as you try to get the nation's housewives fit. Buy a sports bra and GO AWAY.
Switching back to the Beeb I tried to work out if the female presenter was fat or pregnant... she's ever so old if she is in the family way. Then I berated myself for reducing the serious stories of the morning down to my Heat-style, petty observations.
The item that did catch my interest was Jay Rayner plugging his Channel 4 documentary, exploring the quality of supermarket 'basic-brand' food and drink. He's upset that their sausages are made up less of meat, more of crap that will make you ill, steal all your money and shop you to the Inland Revenue for tax evasion. Which is interesting.
I've just finished reading Rayner's book "The Man Who Ate The World", in which he spends THOUSANDS OF POUNDS travelling the world, dining at high-end restaurants, in search of the perfect meal. In one section, he expresses surprise at the notion that people may save up for months on end to have a meal in a restaurant like Petrus. I've eaten at Petrus, it was bloody gorgeous. But at £260, it was the most expensive lunch I have ever eaten, or am likely to eat, and I still experience the occasional shudder of guilt at the sheer decadence of it, despite only having to pay a small proportion of the bill. So I find it odd that Rayner would make a programme denouncing a pack of 99p sausages... Who is he making it for? For the people who buy them? Or for middle class suburbanites, to assuage their middle class guilt and make them feel better about shopping on Ocado?
Discuss.
This morning I decided to have a little Breakfast Television with my cereal, and duly popped BBC Breakfast on. There on the news was Boris Johnson opposing the new Heathrow runway. Now, say what you like about Boris the Bumbling Buffoon, but the video footage they had was of him on a panel with Roy Puddifoot and Zach Goldsmith... Puddifoot looks like a gay serial killer from the 1980s, and to be honest, the entire Goldsmith family look like they're direct descendants of Seabiscuit the Horse. I know who I'd rather have as my mayor.
So... I switched onto GMTV, where I was greeted with the hideous sight of Mr Motivator in his aerobics gear. For god's sake man, give it up. I don't want to see your manboobs jiggling up and down as you try to get the nation's housewives fit. Buy a sports bra and GO AWAY.
Switching back to the Beeb I tried to work out if the female presenter was fat or pregnant... she's ever so old if she is in the family way. Then I berated myself for reducing the serious stories of the morning down to my Heat-style, petty observations.
The item that did catch my interest was Jay Rayner plugging his Channel 4 documentary, exploring the quality of supermarket 'basic-brand' food and drink. He's upset that their sausages are made up less of meat, more of crap that will make you ill, steal all your money and shop you to the Inland Revenue for tax evasion. Which is interesting.
I've just finished reading Rayner's book "The Man Who Ate The World", in which he spends THOUSANDS OF POUNDS travelling the world, dining at high-end restaurants, in search of the perfect meal. In one section, he expresses surprise at the notion that people may save up for months on end to have a meal in a restaurant like Petrus. I've eaten at Petrus, it was bloody gorgeous. But at £260, it was the most expensive lunch I have ever eaten, or am likely to eat, and I still experience the occasional shudder of guilt at the sheer decadence of it, despite only having to pay a small proportion of the bill. So I find it odd that Rayner would make a programme denouncing a pack of 99p sausages... Who is he making it for? For the people who buy them? Or for middle class suburbanites, to assuage their middle class guilt and make them feel better about shopping on Ocado?
Discuss.
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